Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
