For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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