no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
