don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Randomize
