she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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