And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
