I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Randomize
