i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
