I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
