i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
