Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Randomize
