She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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