Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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