Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
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