Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
two words...techno handjob
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
You have to summon your inner elephant
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
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