you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
