I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
