so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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