Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
