after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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