wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Randomize