he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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