Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
