Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
When did angry sex become our thing?
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
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