Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Randomize
