Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
