i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I can text with my tongue
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
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