thus making me awesome and them whores
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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