He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
