I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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