do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize