I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
