You work out of a Hotel?
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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