so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
