i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize