i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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