I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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