tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize