I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
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