One girl and one boy is just not enough.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
