I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
We just shotgunned beers for America
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
