Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
We just shotgunned beers for America
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Randomize
