He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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