The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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