You're my little dorito
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
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