fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Randomize
