yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Randomize
