i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
