dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
