...so i touched it.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
